Hello, friend!

I've been enjoying our new home so much that I've found myself taking an obnoxious number of photographs. Given that Mr. CP loathes having his photograph taken, I'm fairly certain he may rethink this whole marriage thing if I continue down my current path. Only kidding, only kidding. Ish. I've always been a bit of a dabbler when it comes to hobbies and crafty pursuits. I'm fickle that way. So, I suppose it was only a matter of time before I decided to try my hand at taking photographs. Like any new skill, it requires patience (oh gawd, does it require patience!), and practice. In unpacking our belongings, I've came to the conclusion that there are almost no photos of us. In point of fact, I can count on two hands the number of photographs of Mr. CP and I, which is in large part what inspired me to start taking more photographs.

Now that I'm settling in, I'll be able to post with greater frequency. What have I missed while I was away? What have you all been up to?

Blue Dress #3: A Bit of Whimsy

Dress: Dorothy Perkins (here)

Cardigan: Anthropologie/Ribboned Rocket Cardigan

Shoes: GAP

Earrings: Forever 21

When I got home from Anthropologie the other day -- with this cardigan in tow! Sale score FTW! -- I recounted for Mr. CP my uber-bizarre conversation with Boob Job Lady that I talked about in my last post (here). It ended up turning into a fairly lengthy conversation about Mr. CP's and my respective stances on plastic surgery. 

My position is quite simple: your body, your life. I think everyone has a right to feel beautiful, and if that means a nip, a tuck, a lift, a pull, and a few injections, then so be it. For my part, I don't like the idea of elective cosmetic surgery. It gives me the willies. Aside from my father, I avoid physicians like the plague. It's best for all parties involved, you see.

In general, I have a fairly laissez-faire attitude towards life (there are a few areas where this doesn't apply... toilet paper, for example, should always roll down on the roll, not up. Yeesh!). So, my philosophy about plastic surgery is pretty much identical to my philosophy about life (excepting toilet paper, apparently): you do your thing, I'll do mine.

On a completely unrelated note, if ever the Fates conspired to thrust me into a position of power as a benevolent dictator, I would commission a statue to be built immortalizing this expression. I think it says, "Peons, bow before me!" and "But I still love and respect you and your peasant ways!" all at the same time. Behold: Benevolent Dictatoress Kelsey. Ahem. Yes, that's a real word and a real title. Why do you ask? Are you challenging my authority!? Are you?!?!

Blue Dress #2: Spring Has Sprung

Dress: Dorothy Perkins (here)

Cardigan: Anthropologie/Hibai Cardigan

Cami: Herberger's (winner of the Department Store With the Most Hilarious Moniker Award)

Head band: Nordstrom

Shoes: Aldo (here)

Necklace and earrings: DIY

I naively assumed that the Swirling Vortex of Weirdness that has surrounded me for most of my adult life had finally, at long last, dissipated. In my idealism, I assumed that whatever deity I had managed to royally piss off had deigned, in his or her infinite wisdom, to forgive any and all transgressions I had committed. It turns out that The Vortex (yes, capital 'T,' capital 'V') didn't go away. Nope. It was just building up a back log of weirdness to gleefully hurl at me at a moment of its choosing. Apparently, it chose yesterday.

Where to begin... I suppose the best place is with the least bizarre incident. It is very rarely windy here in Seattle. It wasn't unusual, then, that it wasn't windy in the slightest when I stepped outside yesterday morning. It wasn't windy while I walked to the car, or when I got out to walk to the ATM. But, conveniently, there was a single very large burst of wind as I was walking down the sidewalk along a very busy street. And that particular burst of wind was strong enough that it lifted my skirt up around my head. Naturally, I shrieked, "The fuck!?" very shrilly. Which wouldn't have been a problem if I hadn't pulled my skirt back down to the wide-eyed stares of an entire preschool troop walking to who knows where with their teachers. 

As a balm for my humiliation, I decided to head to Anthropologie to check out the semi-annual tag sale that started today. There I was, browsing the racks of items, when a woman came up to me and asked me who did my boob job. Um, 'scuse me? I don't even... What?! I toyed around with the idea of shrieking, "They came this way! Lay off!" But instead, I did what I do best: laughed awkwardly, and made an inappropriate joke. My exact response: "Mother Nature is my plastic surgeon. Who's yours?" She rolled her eyes, and looked at me disbelievingly. I'm choosing to take her question as a compliment. If I interpret it the way my brain is fighting to -- as a creepy, inappropriate query -- I run the risk of becoming even more disillusioned with my fellow human beings than I already am. So... compliment it is!

I finally made my way home to two very hyper cats (kitty number three is currently vacationing with her grandparents until we get moved next month). Anyway, Gabe (aka Boy Cat) and Luna (aka Fish) were chasing each other around the house like cats are wont to do. Fish was very naughty, and hopped up on the toilet seat, and before I could make my way to the bathroom to shoo her off, Boy Cat pushed her in. The toilet, that is. Fish fell in the toilet. Thankfully, I had just cleaned it this morning... but still. It's a toilet. Blech. So, I got to give Fish a bath today. Without the full body armor that such a chore typically demands. It was... interesting.

Anyhoodle, I'm hoping I'm all paid up on weirdness for a while. Fingers crossed.

Blue Dress #1: Crayon-y Goodness

Things that have been making me feel like this:

* Cold, rainy days

* Thoughts of packing up our house for the big move next month

* Flying the kittens to Mama and Papa CP's place until we get to Colorado

* Grumpy gills people

* The fact that the ice cream truck has been avoiding me

Things that have been making me feel like this:

* Anything Kelly Green, or Cobalt Blue

* Thoughts of moving closer to all my beautiful BFFs in Colorado

* Red lipstick

* Sunshine!

* This dress. I don't care if I get stinky. I'm never taking this thing off.

* My superfantasticalawesomeful fiance (Whew! That was a close one. I almost forgot to include him on this list... JK! JK! He was at the top with a bullet, a star, AND an exclamation point until I moved him down a few notches on the list for comedic effect. That's how I roll.)

Outfit details

Dress: Dorothy Perkins (here)

Cardigan: Nordstrom/Halogen (here)

Shoes: Aldo (similar here)

Belt: Nordstrom Rack

Head band: J. Crew

I have absolutely no idea why I'm hunched over in both of these photos. Actually, in all the photos Mr. CP took, I was in various states of hunching. Apparently I felt like getting hunchy with it... nanananananana. Ahem... I apologize for the terrible Will Smith reference. I just couldn't help myself.

Okay, as promised, I'm going to do something a bit different for the rest of May... you know, all two weeks of it. heh I'm going to pick one item from my closet, and style it for you in 3 different ways. That means you'll be getting an OOTD post three days this week, AND three days next week. I've been slacking on posting outfits, so I'm hoping this will help me get back into the swing of things. First up: this dress. Because I love it. It makes my heart soar. And it feels like jammies. And it's blue. And it lends itself to primary-color-crayon hued outfits like this one.

Guessing Game

Okay. I had fully intended to remain strong in the wake of all these Friends and Family, and Mid-Season Sales. For the most part, I managed to control my shopaholic tendencies by avoiding those websites that were both the most tempting, and still out of my price range (I'm looking at you, Kate Spade).

And then... and THEN Dorothy Perkins happened. I logged on to DP's website intending to add a few things to my already lengthy wish list, only to find that they, too, are in the throes of a Mid-Season Sale. I tried to walk away, folks. Really, I did. Sort of. A little bit. Okay, I meant to walk away and make myself a pot of tea, but somewhere along the way I got confused, added two items to my shopping cart, and purchased them. And then I made tea.

Which brings me to the guessing game. Which of the items below do you think I ordered? ;)

Blue Spot Print Denim Dress

Neutral Damask Prom Dress

Ivory Fan Stitch Cardigan

Cream Poodle Print Scarf

Taupe Bird Box Pleat Dress

If I Had a Magic Lamp...

Helloooo! You may have noticed that I've been a bit absent this week. Seattle is currently buried in an uncharacteristically deep layer of snow, and so the city has, for the most part, shut down. As a result, I've been lounging around in my pajamas for the vast majority of this week (read: ALL of this week). Because OOTD posts were out, I was having one of those weeks where I couldn't decide what to post about. Wedding planning? Wish list items? Garden gnomes? I ultimately decided to go with the second idea (as evidenced by the title of this post). Anyway, these are just a few of the items I'm desperately coveting. 

I've already ordered one of these. Can you guess which one?

Botanical Flutter Dress, Dorothy Perkins (here)

Clockworks Shirt Dress, eShakti (here)

Flamingo Print Jumper, Dorothy Perkins (here)

Gray Heart Print Cardigan, Dorothy Perkins (here)

 Bird Print Button Back Top, Dorothy Perkins (here)

The Infamous Wedding

Dress: Dorothy Perkins

Cami (which is actually a Cami Bra): Le Mystere

Shoes: Naya

Jewelry: Betsey Johnson

Clutch: DIY

There are few things more wonderful than making unexpected friends. I headed to North Carolina this past weekend for an old family friend's wedding, and had no idea what to expect. I only knew that the colors black and red were off-limits, and that spooky accessories were strongly encouraged. In the lead up to the wedding, the bride arranged a Girls' Night for anyone interested in attending. I arrived expecting to feel out of place and uncomfortable, but after a mere ten minutes with that group of women I felt like I had known them all for years. Among my favorite moments of the evening was listening to one of the bridesmaids recount the tale of how she unknowingly started beating an off-duty cop with clothing-filled Target bags. She had just left Target late one night when she heard foot steps right behind her. The way she tells it, she weighed her options. I distinctly remember her saying, "I'm fat, you know, so I sure as hell wasn't going to be able to outrun the guy. I would have collapse after 10 yards." No, her best option, she decided, was to stand and fight. So, she subtly weighed the bags in her hands, chose the lightest one, and turned around swinging... and continued swinging... over and over and over. The man ended up on the ground while she hit him with her Target bags, ultimately realizing that in the interest of self-preservation it would be wise to flash her his badge. Turns out the guy was parked right next to the bridesmaid, and was just walking back to his car. Poor guy. Many hilarious stories were told that night, so many that I can't even remember the last time that I laughed so hard or so much. My sides were very, very sore the next day.

I apologize for the relative lack of photos. This was just a quick picture my mother snapped with my iPhone before we headed in to the wedding reception!

Window Shopping: Dorothy Perkins

One of my favorite things to do in the evenings is curl up with a glass of wine, and do some serious window shopping online. It's one of the reasons I have such a lengthy wish list. Lately, I've been finding some truly adorable items at Dorothy Perkins. It all began when I spotted the perfect dress for the wedding I'm going to, er, next week. I decided to overlook the exorbitant cost of international shipping, and placed my order... which I still can't believe I did. May I just offer up a general, "Ugh" about the ridiculous cost of international shipping? But I digress. I didn't order anything else, in large part because I didn't look too carefully at the site. Upon second... and third... and fourth glance, however, I found some really, really cute items that I promptly added to my Amazon wish list. =) Below are my five favorites that are currently available (in my size) at Dorothy Perkins.

Black Bird on a Wire Top

Green Floral Belted Skirt

Ochre Ponte Circle Dress

Mink Sausage Dog Jumper 

Grey Zebra Print Cardigan